In my previous post, I wrote about the day when we saw Zoe's face for the first time. I was drawn to her. There was something wonderfully special about that little girl with the pony-tail standing up on the top of her head and sitting in that purple bumbo. Well, we weren't the only family who was interested in her. In fact, Eun-ha was on that photolisting less than 12 hours and 5 different families requested her file. We were one family of five. All of the families were sent her complete medical files, background info, etc. and each family can then decide if they want to proceed or not. We had her file reviewed by a few different doctors and decided to proceed with her adoption. Well, over the course of the next few days, 2 other families said they were interested in her adoption too. In fact, one other family was interested, but with 3 families already willing, they bowed out.
Basically, when a family says they want to adopt a "waiting child" (which Zoe was... we saw her face on the photolisting), there are a ton of questions to answer. Think essay questions on how you would parent the child, how you plan to raise the child who is a different race (assuming you are not Korean), how you plan to care for the child in light of their medical or other needs, etc. I set out on a mission to answer these questions. I cried over those essays. I really had to mentally put myself into the role of her mother and answer questions on how we intend to raise her as her forever family. Emotions were running high. Once all the interested families completed their questionnaires, each family had a phone interview with the Waiting Child Program, and a committee would meet and select her family. Talk about nerve-wrecking. Looking back, that time has become a blur.
I can never fully explain the feeling I had knowing how deeply I cared for that baby, yet knowing she may or may not be ours forever. I cried A LOT, I prayed A LOT and I didn't sleep. I was a mess. I trusted that God knew how this would play out. I trusted that He knew what was best for our family. I believed with all my heart that God would not bring us to this point to leave us. Regardless of the outcome, He would sustain us and would eventually bring us to the child He chose for us... even if it wasn't this baby that I had come to love. At the time, we had 3 photos of her. We knew her story. We knew her name . I took hope in the fact that even if we were not chosen, this baby would have a family. She was no longer 1 of the millions of orphans without a mommy and a daddy. She would be someone's chosen and cherished daughter. Honestly, I wanted her to be MY chosen and cherished daughter, but I gave it to Him.
About a week before committee met, I had posted on the Holt Forums Board that we were going to committee for a baby and a woman contacted me saying that she thought we were going to committee for the same baby. We talked online through email and I came to enjoy my online chats with this mom, Ramsey. Ramsey is a mom to three beautiful girls and is an OBGYN. (Yeah, that was a little intimidating!) Her husband is Sheref; he's a pediatrician. (okay, that's doubly-intimidating!) I prayed that God would give this baby to one of our two families so I could always know she went to a great family! (since we didn't know who the 3rd family was.) Some people might have thought that it was strange that I was talking to "the competition", but I didn't see it that way. We are both moms; we are wives; we are both on this adoption journey to our children and we shared a love for the same baby. We both thought our phone interviews were weird and awkward and plain terrible and I was sure that the doctors would be given this baby and that somehow God would heal my heart and help us move forward to finding our child. Then the news came that the third family decided not to proceed, so it was just us and Ramsey's family. I had more peace knowing that one of our families would have her, but it still wasn't an easy time.
The committee met and (obviously) we were chosen to be the parents of Eun-ha. God knew. He knew all along. I was grateful and excited. We had a daughter, but I knew my new friend would be sad. I knew she wanted her too. I prayed that this sweet family would fine their baby soon! Just a few weeks later, that family got matched with this little cute boy!
Just this past week, Sheref went to Korea to bring that cute Charlie home. After 3 girls, I think that boy will be a lot of fun for them! Charlie and his daddy are safely back home. Here is a pic of all of them together... How cute are they!?!?
While Sheref was in Korea, he went and visited Zoe. Too bad he didn't smuggle her home in his carry-on bag, but he visited with her, took some photos and 4 videos for us. Here is a picture he took of her. She's wearing an outfit we sent. Yeah, I think I saw my husband fall in love when he saw her wearing that Daddy's Girl shirt.
I just think it's amazing how things have come full-circle. Zoe will soon be home to our family, Charlie is safely at home with his forever family and I have a special friendship with a mama I've never met in real-life. I can't wait until the day when we can get our families and Korean babies together.
"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future." -Jeremiah 29:11
God had big plans for us and for these two babies. Things happened just as He knew they would and two families are changed forever! Kinda' cool if you ask me.
~Paula
